[Kashuu, at least, looks vaguely apologetic! But how much does that really mean when he's still just kind of chilling out on this chocobo, adding to the distressing confusion that is Luke's unfortunate life.]
Morning.
[DON'T ACT LIKE THIS IS SO NORMAL.]
I'm still not entirely sure what's happening? I don't know what chocobos eat either, but this was basically the best idea.
[That alone says so much without him actually saying anything.]
[And again there's the cycle of staring at Baren, then the Chocobo, and then Kashuu on the Chocobo. The Chocobo's probably a little impatient considering it's hungry but on the other hand Luke's settling on staring for another long moment before pinching the bridge of his nose with one hand, sighing heavily and focusing.]
Three things. [He holds up one finger for each point.] One. Why do you think I would know what they eat? Two. How did you even get it here without anybody else noticing? And three. Where did you get the bird? Seriously, where did it come from, aren't most of them kept in stables or something?
...and fourth question. [This is to Kashuu.] Why do you keep letting him talk you into stupid shit?
[He's not mad, surprisingly, but he sure is baffled. Thanks y'all.]
[He's Baren, mirroring Luke's posture as he... proceeds to answer all the questions in order? But are they good answers? Well, we're about to find out.]
One. I know what they eat! Your kitchen was just the most stocked one on the way over to where we're taking him. Two. I think some people noticed but these fuckers are fast, it's great! Three. Oh yeah, he came from a stable.
And four.... Well, that's a big question, Luke. But I can let you know since you're doing so much for us and V by letting us in.
[is that indignant squawking coming from the chocobo or kashuu, it's hard to tell! The chocobo definitely looks hungry and stamps one of its feet, perhaps considering running Luke down to get at the food it can smell inside...
Kashuu just looks caught somewhere between aging a hundred years and wanting to strangle Baren. So basically it's just another night ending in y!]
Y'know, it's stuff like that that gets me stuck with your crazy jealous fan stalkers. [SET HIM FREE.
He doesn't actually have an answer to Luke's question, though. In the end he just sort of shrugs like a helpless nerd.]
I'd say it seemed like a good idea at the time but I didn't actually know what the idea was until we got to the stable. ...He's a really pretty color though, isn't he?
[Patting V proudly even though THAT'S NOT THE POINT AT ALL.]
[It's probably both? He can deal with both squawking boys and squawking Chocobos but why. Why is this real. Please don't charge, pretty bird, he's not in the mood.]
On the bright side I don't want to marry Baren so you're safe for now. [Just a thought.] Nothing about this says "good idea", both of you. Especially since I'm hearing you, what, stole a Chocobo and decided to feed him at my bar? Are we even sure he's going to fit inside?
[...] He is a good color though. [Help them.]
walks in 5 years later with starbucks and Baby Come Back playing in the bg
[no, V being a pretty bird is definitely a good enough reason. Baren's at least gonna wander over to their new pet now, offering a hand up to pet him - apparently people hate Baren but he's some kind of animal whisperer and V just takes a shine to him almost immediately, making an impatient noise but just butting his hand instead]
We're gonna have to find out! What if people catch us out here and realize he's not supposed to be ours?
You can't separate us from him, Luke - don't be heartless!
Yeah, thanks for not wanting to marry Baren, you're saving me a lot of trouble.
[The fact that he can say this and mean it both jokingly and seriously, though...
Anyway, he'll just let Baren be the chocobo whisperer here since he gave up long ago on trying to understand why Baren's a Disney princess when he's also actually satan. Instead, he just kind of gives Luke a pleading look...]
Okay but also more importantly than being separated? We really don't need to get involved with police right now. Like, really. So maybe let's just try to fit him in and if he scratches the floor I'll- [get someone else to] -buffer it out or something.
Oh my god it's not being heartless, you idiots. [But he's sighing anyway, watching the bird before he steps out of the way to motion them inside.] I'd rather not deal with the cops tonight either, so hurry up and lure the bird in here before I change my mind. Once he's in we're going to talk about what the fuck you're going to do with him next and if he pecks me, I'm kicking you all out.
though he's also just going to look like he Won when luke agrees to let them into the bar. with the chocobo. baren's laughing, pulling on V's bridle and leeeeaaading the giant fucking bird into Cabin Eleven - ]
[He's already ducking before Baren even says anything... He's gotten used to this situation way too easily?! But that's just how things go when you spend excessive amounts of time around Baren. You adapt or you die.]
You don't have to worry about being pecked, at least. V's a really good bird, see?
Depends. Do these things eat leftover cheese fries? Got plenty of those. And probably arugula...that's not going that well for me. Why'd you name the thing V anyway? What does that mean?
[AND WHY ARE YOU ATTACHED...it's a somewhat maybe possibly wild bird and Luke doesn't trust this okay.]
You're looking at Louis McQueen Stella Galliano Wang Rykiel Vuitton. [it's just a bunch of designer names...... but Baren's still affectionately petting their beloved Louis McQueen Stella Galliano Wang Rykiel Vuitton on the head as they enter the bar with this chocobo
there is now a chocobo in luke's bar at 3 am]
Cheese fries will have to do for now. I wouldn't shovel arugula onto my worst enemy.
[ . . . . actually
the look on his face after he says it implies that he thinks that's not a bad idea]
Kashuu will finally hop on off of V's back once they're all situated cozily inside, though! And then pat it gently because he's apparently gone from "why the fck do chocobos exist" to "this is my favorite chocobo in all the lands" in like 2 hours. Or however long it took them to steal and flee.]
Can I have some, too? I didn't get the chance to grab dinner before I left.
[Luckily the ceiling is very tall and it means that V can hang out comfortable, too. Kashuu lands on the ground and Luke rolls his eyes, signaling for the idiot brigade to sit at the bar before he turns to head toward the back again. Sure. He'll feed everybody, whatever.]
Gimme ten. Do I want to know which of you came up with the name? That sounds all...fashion-y. [Just saying. It could be either of them at this rate.]
[it's the dead of night and everyone is mooching off of luke tonight. but baren's excited for this, taking up a seat at a bar and making a faint clicking noise to get v's attention and gesturing for the chocobo to come to him, letting his arm fall comfortably around his neck]
I'm impressed that you recognized it as fashion... So you do listen to us when we talk - I thought you just had really well-timed head nods.
Hey, if you're listening enough to get that, you should listen when I make wardrobe suggestions!
[LUMBERJACK CHIC, LUKE!! But he'll trot over too and take up what is probably His Usual Seat, propping his elbows up on the counter because no one has to worry about being elegant when their company is Baren, Luke and a giant chicken.]
Fuck off. [It's casual because...yeah, he sure does. It sucks.] I've learned how to pick out the important parts of your bullshit and I always listen to Kashuu. [Because Thalia would probably kick his ass but also he likes Kashuu a lot. He's also busy making food, give him time.]
That definitely doesn't answer my question though. I want to know who to blame for this one.
[and that's something that he says with confidence, even though there's a solid chance that it's false. followed by something else that is even more false:]
It's like Kiyo and I are of one mind sometimes, you know?
Just try not to destroy the town more than it's already wrecked, okay guys? [He's grinning though despite himself because as much as he bitches especially about Baren's dumb ideas, he tolerates both of them pretty well. It's not long before the first plate of cheese fries parks itself in front of Kashuu, along with what looks like a few of those little cheeseburger sliders. It's been a busy night and Luke's learning how to actually operate a kitchen.]
So the real question is if you're up to date on what's going on around here. Kashuu and I have had the app for a while, but. [A shrug.] Have you guys had the chance to really dig into it?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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Morning.
[DON'T ACT LIKE THIS IS SO NORMAL.]
I'm still not entirely sure what's happening? I don't know what chocobos eat either, but this was basically the best idea.
[That alone says so much without him actually saying anything.]
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Three things. [He holds up one finger for each point.] One. Why do you think I would know what they eat? Two. How did you even get it here without anybody else noticing? And three. Where did you get the bird? Seriously, where did it come from, aren't most of them kept in stables or something?
...and fourth question. [This is to Kashuu.] Why do you keep letting him talk you into stupid shit?
[He's not mad, surprisingly, but he sure is baffled. Thanks y'all.]
[1/2]
One. I know what they eat! Your kitchen was just the most stocked one on the way over to where we're taking him. Two. I think some people noticed but these fuckers are fast, it's great! Three. Oh yeah, he came from a stable.
And four.... Well, that's a big question, Luke. But I can let you know since you're doing so much for us and V by letting us in.
[HE'S NOT LETTING YOU IN YET]
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He loves me! We're eloping! Surprise! ♥
[NO]
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Kashuu just looks caught somewhere between aging a hundred years and wanting to strangle Baren. So basically it's just another night ending in y!]
Y'know, it's stuff like that that gets me stuck with your crazy jealous fan stalkers. [SET HIM FREE.
He doesn't actually have an answer to Luke's question, though. In the end he just sort of shrugs like a helpless nerd.]
I'd say it seemed like a good idea at the time but I didn't actually know what the idea was until we got to the stable. ...He's a really pretty color though, isn't he?
[Patting V proudly even though THAT'S NOT THE POINT AT ALL.]
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On the bright side I don't want to marry Baren so you're safe for now. [Just a thought.] Nothing about this says "good idea", both of you. Especially since I'm hearing you, what, stole a Chocobo and decided to feed him at my bar? Are we even sure he's going to fit inside?
[...] He is a good color though. [Help them.]
walks in 5 years later with starbucks and Baby Come Back playing in the bg
We're gonna have to find out! What if people catch us out here and realize he's not supposed to be ours?
You can't separate us from him, Luke - don't be heartless!
[shut up baren]
new thread who dis
[The fact that he can say this and mean it both jokingly and seriously, though...
Anyway, he'll just let Baren be the chocobo whisperer here since he gave up long ago on trying to understand why Baren's a Disney princess when he's also actually satan. Instead, he just kind of gives Luke a pleading look...]
Okay but also more importantly than being separated? We really don't need to get involved with police right now. Like, really. So maybe let's just try to fit him in and if he scratches the floor I'll- [get someone else to] -buffer it out or something.
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[...IDIOTS.]
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though he's also just going to look like he Won when luke agrees to let them into the bar. with the chocobo. baren's laughing, pulling on V's bridle and leeeeaaading the giant fucking bird into Cabin Eleven - ]
Duck if you have to, Kiyo. ♪
What's on the menu, Luke?
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[He's already ducking before Baren even says anything... He's gotten used to this situation way too easily?! But that's just how things go when you spend excessive amounts of time around Baren. You adapt or you die.]
You don't have to worry about being pecked, at least. V's a really good bird, see?
[WHY IS HE ALREADY ATTACHED.]
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[AND WHY ARE YOU ATTACHED...it's a somewhat maybe possibly wild bird and Luke doesn't trust this okay.]
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there is now a chocobo in luke's bar at 3 am]
Cheese fries will have to do for now. I wouldn't shovel arugula onto my worst enemy.
[ . . . . actually
the look on his face after he says it implies that he thinks that's not a bad idea]
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Kashuu will finally hop on off of V's back once they're all situated cozily inside, though! And then pat it gently because he's apparently gone from "why the fck do chocobos exist" to "this is my favorite chocobo in all the lands" in like 2 hours. Or however long it took them to steal and flee.]
Can I have some, too? I didn't get the chance to grab dinner before I left.
[HE'S HUNGRY.]
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Gimme ten. Do I want to know which of you came up with the name? That sounds all...fashion-y. [Just saying. It could be either of them at this rate.]
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I'm impressed that you recognized it as fashion... So you do listen to us when we talk - I thought you just had really well-timed head nods.
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[LUMBERJACK CHIC, LUKE!! But he'll trot over too and take up what is probably His Usual Seat, propping his elbows up on the counter because no one has to worry about being elegant when their company is Baren, Luke and a giant chicken.]
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That definitely doesn't answer my question though. I want to know who to blame for this one.
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[and that's something that he says with confidence, even though there's a solid chance that it's false. followed by something else that is even more false:]
It's like Kiyo and I are of one mind sometimes, you know?
[it's why they're getting married]
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Also, here are the moments when Kashuu plays along with Baren so seamlessly that it's obvious he's one of party satan's henchmen.]
We're launching more collabs soon so I hope you'll keep an eye out, okay? It'll all be as exciting as this!
[Just to give Luke something to be concerned about.]
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So the real question is if you're up to date on what's going on around here. Kashuu and I have had the app for a while, but. [A shrug.] Have you guys had the chance to really dig into it?