[ Adam, surprisingly, has a hard time sleeping. He usually takes advantage of any moment of rest he can, but, unfortunately, another trial has gotten to him. It's easy when he sees the culprits as bad people, murderers who killed innocents, who get their rightful execution. Less so when it's someone he knows is a kind person (not a good person) who only wanted to save her sister. Wouldn't he do anything to save Gansey? He'd have no regrets either, even if he was killed for it. So he wakes up for the list and frowns when he hears about Dorian. There's plenty of people on there and Bull, for sure, won't let anything happen to him... but Adam still wants to find a way to keep him safe.
It's what he contemplates over breakfast, while he wanders around the garden for a little peace. He ends up in his room before the motive in order to write notes about the last trial, in a better state of mind now. He hears secrets and stiffens at his desk. He doesn't even know what secret it might be, he has so many. So many that he never told Ronan or Gansey. He takes a break before checking his datapad and—he's angry. He's angry and upset and terrified. What right does the AI have to talk about this? What right do the people on the ship have to know about this? Gansey and Ronan already know, but what does she mean by everyone? The people at college?
He imagines the pitying looks he'll get there, that he'll get here. It makes him sick. He's tried so hard to get past it, to move away from his past and present himself as someone else. Why does this have to follow him? Is that all he'll ever be? He crushes the paper he was working on, crumples it in his hand and he has to work to not start kicking his desk. He doesn't get much of a chance anyway, not when he hears Luke calling for him. He thinks it's coming from the other side of the door (a stupid assumption considering the mostly soundproof rooms but he's emotionally compromised, alright) so he doesn't move immediately, not sure if he's ready for the questions he'll get. Then Luke is climbing up his ladder and he turns in his chair, surprised until he remembers that he should have expected that—then angry. Probably not entirely at him. ]
Seriously, man? I don't remember giving you unlimited access to my room.
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It's what he contemplates over breakfast, while he wanders around the garden for a little peace. He ends up in his room before the motive in order to write notes about the last trial, in a better state of mind now. He hears secrets and stiffens at his desk. He doesn't even know what secret it might be, he has so many. So many that he never told Ronan or Gansey. He takes a break before checking his datapad and—he's angry. He's angry and upset and terrified. What right does the AI have to talk about this? What right do the people on the ship have to know about this? Gansey and Ronan already know, but what does she mean by everyone? The people at college?
He imagines the pitying looks he'll get there, that he'll get here. It makes him sick. He's tried so hard to get past it, to move away from his past and present himself as someone else. Why does this have to follow him? Is that all he'll ever be? He crushes the paper he was working on, crumples it in his hand and he has to work to not start kicking his desk. He doesn't get much of a chance anyway, not when he hears Luke calling for him. He thinks it's coming from the other side of the door (a stupid assumption considering the mostly soundproof rooms but he's emotionally compromised, alright) so he doesn't move immediately, not sure if he's ready for the questions he'll get. Then Luke is climbing up his ladder and he turns in his chair, surprised until he remembers that he should have expected that—then angry. Probably not entirely at him. ]
Seriously, man? I don't remember giving you unlimited access to my room.